quinta-feira, 15 de setembro de 2016

Mistakes

I trusted you
When you said you and M had nothing

I trusted you
When you said you were only hanging out with friends

I trusted you
When you told me J was just a friend 

I trusted you
When you said I was the only one

I trusted you
When you said V never meant anything to you

I trusted you
When you went on parties and said everything was alright

I trusted you
When you said I was the one who was lying

I trusted you
When you said you loved me

I trusted you when you lied


And because I trusted you I can't trust anyone else 

domingo, 21 de fevereiro de 2016

Self talk

It's just when you're alone that you stop and feel all the shit you have never felt before. You know, in the surface of your brain, that he doesn't want to hurt you because he loves you but, God, Everybody wants to hurt you cause, GOD, Everybody wants to push you down cause, God, They want to break you for their own bennefit and it's so weird that it's the first time in forever that someone ACTUALLY DOES NOT mean to hurt you and it makes you wonder, God, Why doesn't he want to hurt me if everyone did before and, God, Why is he saying those things if he doesn't want to hurt me and, GOD, Can you please please make it go away Because there you were, abandoned by your mother and father and the assholes that you had as a boyfriends before. God They ended me and, God, They wanted to hurt me so I'd be too hurt to run away and, GOOD GOD Someone actually doesnt want to hurt me no matter what But then you get hurt all over again and you realize... No one will ever not hurt you like they said they wouldn't. The difference is that some people want you to be hurt and some people regret when they hurt you. And that's one of the many reasons why I love him Because he's my safe haven and he will never mean to hurt me.